I have not played Elder Scrolls Online so I apologise for any misconceptions but from looking at gameplay it appears not that much different from other MMORPG's (I have played Neverwinter and am currently at level 65) in that you can pretty much see online players doing exactly the same thing you are doing which IMHO is kind of offputting.

At least with Oblivion (over 100 hours) and Skyrim (over 300 hours) you are effectively the only person or group that is actually doing something so it is rather a private affair that is very common in single or co-op player in many RPG's. Personally, I actually prefer this.

I will use Neverwinter (it's free to download and play) as an example since that is a game I am still playing. As I have mentioned seeing other players can be offputting although at the same time players can actually help each other (PvP is different) which can be a plus as well. Like any RPG you can grind although in Neverwinter most missions and quests are varied and interesting enough with some being class dependent so you don't really have to grind and when you enter a dungeon, ruin or cave that is effectively a private affair which as I have mentioned I prefer.

Neverwinter does have plenty of microtransactions and there is DLC for extra gameplay. You can play Neverwinter without making any microtransaction purchases if you wish (it is not Pay to Win) unless you are not very skilled or impatient or just want something that only a few players have.

Now substitute "Elder Scrolls Online" with "Neverwinter" and I believe you won't find much difference in general activities. This is not to say that is a bad thing but I personally prefer a more private affair that is why I would prefer an Eder Scrolls VI.

One thing that can kill any online game be it Shooter or RPG is "latency" of which RPG's are normally more forgiving is having to wait 0.5 of a second or worse can be really offputting. Even though I have broadband, on occasion I get delays of more than a second which are just unacceptable. Fortunately this does not happen that often.