Videogamer writes: "Master art thief Charles Deckard creeps cautiously towards the box. Pandora's Box, to be exact. It sits on top of a raised platform in a darkened New York museum room. Hired by the mysterious Professor Lefey, Deckard knows not of the havoc, destruction and chaos he is about to unleash upon the world. All he cares about is swiping the box's valuable innards and getting the hell out of there undetected.
Deckard, a suited and booted man who's the antithesis of your typical muscle bound FPS marine, puts his hand on the box. Bad move.
The box closes in around Deckard's hand, clamping him to its outer casing. Cue the spewing forth of explosions, beams of red fire and all manner of madness as the museum is shook to the core. All those legendary beasts of myth and lore, the ones your parents spoke about in bed time stories - well they're real. Very real. And now they've been let loose. New York, indeed the world, will never be the same again."
In this special 'Sadistic Santa' edition of the Black Panel Podcast, the team discusses the horrid presents they have received for Xmas, including Farming Simulator, Duke Nukem Forever and Legendary.
Looking for great games for the holidays?
In honor of Thanksgiving and real turkeys everywhere that have laid down their lives in the service of your belly, here is a small collection of PC gaming 'turkeys' we've reviewed over the last year to avoid this holiday season.
Blair Herter announces the winner of G-Phoria '09 Game Most Deserving of a Uwe Boll Movie. Nominees include 'Golden Axe: Beast Rider', 'Castlevania Judgment', 'Legendary', 'Onechanbara: Bikini Zombie Slayer' and 'X-Blades'.
NOTHING deserves a Uwe Boll movie. That guy is simply atrocious at everything he does. I can't believe how he can make a move so stupid, I'm not kidding I got sick after watching House of the Dead. It's like he actually wants to fail. A monkey with a camera and 10 bucks can make a better movie than this guy.
"Until the law was changed in 2005, Boll was able to acquire funding thanks to German tax laws that reward investments in film. The law allowed investors in German-owned films to write off 100% of their investment as a tax deduction; it also allowed them to invest borrowed money and write off any fees associated with the loan. The investor was then only required to pay taxes on the profits made by the movie; if the movie loses money, the investor got a tax writeoff."
And in his own words, "Maybe you know it but it's not so easy to finance movies in total. And the reason I am able to do these kind of movies is I have a tax shelter fund in Germany, and if you invest in a movie in Germany you get basically fifty percent back from the Government."
He basically makes money even if its crap, which all of them have been.
I've already seen an Onechanbara movie. Made in Japan and campy as hell but I enjoyed it thou :)
